health & drugs

In America, advertising prescription drugs on TV is perfectly legal. Yeah, like how bonkers is that?
"Go and ask your doctor for this drug, they'll totally give it to you 'cause they're in the pockets of big pharma."
Still...yay capitalism. If you need a headline for a gym, diet plan, drugs, or health issues, you're in the wrong place.

extended bifrontal craniotomy. it literally is brain surgery.

meds this good should be illegal.

if you want to be the picture of health, be a rembrandt.

an apple a day keeps the doctor away (OFFER NOT LEGALLY BINDING)

it takes 18 months to cure a ham. we'll cure you faster. 

if we can't get you in shape, you'll at least become a shape.

old? back pain? trouble moving? what did you expect, you're nearly dead.

side-effects CONSIDERABLY worse than your actual condition.

putting on a bra should not count as your daily PUSH-UP routine.

excruciating pain. some gain.

got heartburn? no wonder, look at all the awful crap you eat.

overweight? stressed out? high CHOLESTEROL? there's a pill for that.

too fat to get a date? join the gym that turns nope into grope.

ask your doctor about how much crippling college debt they have.

supplements that make you look better. prices that make you feel better.